When I was 12, I learned in my social studies class about the internment of Japanese Americans during World War II. That night at dinner, I asked my parents why this happened. "We were at war with Japan," my mother said.
I knew that my parents' families were descended from German immigrants, "Why didn't the government put your families in internment camps?" I asked. "We were at war with Germany too."
My mother cut me off angrily, responding, "You just don't understand."
Oh, but I did. I realized how dehumanizing and dangerous it is to label people we see as different, to see them as a threat.
My father was an Air Force pilot, and I'd met many people from different cultures on his assignments throughout the United States, Europe, and the Far East. I enjoyed learning about people's different customs, different languages, and beliefs. And I also saw how we had a lot in common.
When we react to peoples' differences as a threat, a fear reaction shuts down our higher brain centers (LeDoux, 1996). We reduce another human being to that one quality that is "different," labeling them by race, gender, culture, age, social class, sexual orientation, occupation—and the list goes on.
This kind of labeling is not only disrespectful to the other person but also to ourselves, for it disconnects us from our common humanity, the underlying unity of life.
What's the alternative? Respect for ourselves and others, the ability to listen and learn from our differences, to expand our experience, to discover new possibilities.
If you'd like to expand your awareness of differences, you can join me in this brief meditative exercise.
- First, close your eyes or shift them into a gentle downward gaze. Then breathe in, focusing on your heart, and slowly breathe out.
- As you continue breathing slowly and deeply, think of someone who is different from you—someone out of your comfort zone.
- Is this someone from another culture? Another country? Another race? Religion? Age? Occupation? Political party? Or some other quality that feels different to you? Breathe in as you visualize this person standing before you now.
- Then feel a radiant white light surrounding this person, surrounding you, filling you with greater curiosity, compassion, and respect.
- As you continue breathing slowly and mindfully, shift your attention to the natural world around you where differences are part of the universal harmony of opposites, as the Tao Te Ching puts it, yin and yang--day and night, sunlight and shadow, sound and silence, earth and sky.
And the next time, you find yourself starting to judge and label someone for being different, pause for a mindful moment and see both of you surrounded by the light, connected in the deeper harmony of all that is.
I wish you joy on the path.
Reference
LeDoux, J. (1996). The emotional brain. New York, NY: Simon & Schuster.